How to Survive the Newborn Stage

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As I write this, my 3 month old is just drifting off to sleep in her crib. I’ve been in and out of her room probably six times now to settle her down. While I won’t pretend it doesn’t get a little tiring, this is such a different routine than just a couple months ago when she was brand new. Are you wondering how to survive the newborn stage? It’s no joke! You’re tired, your partner’s tired, your baby is tired and hungry and who knows what else. It can be overwhelming but it is doable. Once you’ve made it through this, check out my post on what I wish I knew about postpartum recovery. Here’s some tips and tricks that helped me along the way.

Learn to Soothe

If you haven’t had your baby yet, you’ll soon find out soothing is a big part of the newborn stage. What worked best for us was the 5 S’s from Dr. Harvey Karp’s “The Happiest Baby on the Block“. All too often, exhaustion got the best of us and we would forget to use the soothing techniques. As soon as we remembered, it calmed our Peanut right down and she would be able to nurse or fall asleep happily. These steps were vital! If you can, try and do some research on soothing methods before your baby arrives. It was a lifesaver to be able to remember the techniques in the middle of the night with a crying baby.

Ask for Help

Early on, I tried not to wake my husband every time I needed to nurse the baby. I thought it seemed silly for both of us to end up more tired when I could do it on my own. While that was true, things were so much easier for all of us when I asked for help. Sure, my husband couldn’t nurse her (but maybe, in the future? Science!) but he could bring her to me in bed, change her diaper, and lay her back down when I was done. Did he lose some sleep? Sure. Were we both happier and better off? Definitely. Just because motherhood makes us superhuman, it doesn’t mean we have to do it all alone. This extends beyond your partner, too. Ask your mom, your friends, whoever is willing to lend you a hand to make it through these tiring days and nights.

Remember to Eat

Just like growing a baby takes a lot of nutrients, nurturing your new postpartum body and baby requires food – and lots of it! This is especially true if you are breastfeeding, but all moms need to eat well and often. This might sound like a no-brainer, but your new schedule may surprise you. If you’ve been pacing the halls to try to get the baby to sleep, you may not realize you missed dinner. Or maybe you’re just about to fall asleep and your stomach growls – is it worth it to get up and eat if your baby will only be asleep for a few more minutes? Enlist someone to help you out – you may not always be able to get up and fix yourself something to eat, but if someone can bring you something (a granola bar, bowl of pasta, anything!) you can keep your energy up. You can’t survive the newborn stage if you don’t eat!

An important note here – there is a lot of pressure from the world to “bounce back” to your pre-pregnancy body. If you haven’t heard it yet, let me be the one to tell you: YOU DON’T NEED TO BOUNCE BACK. You created a human being, a whole and completely new person. That is a miracle! Restricting your food in an attempt to “get your body back” is not worth it. Feed your body well and appreciate it for the work that it’s done. The newborn stage is not the time to think about weight loss.

Do What Works

If you don’t take anything else from this post, take this: Do what works for you. If a certain soothing technique or product isn’t working for you, try something else! We felt a lot of pressure (okay, maybe just me) early on to use the items we had purchased before baby came, even if we didn’t like them. In the same sense, if something is working for you, don’t let peer pressure keep you from doing it. While there is tons of advice on whether or not to sleep train, or swaddle, or breastfeed, or use formula, if someone else’s recommendations mess up your life or make you and baby unhappy, you don’t have to do it! Do what works for you and your baby. (This comes with the obvious caveat of “Don’t do anything that might endanger you or your baby! Check with your pediatrician if you’re worried.”)

A final note – if you feel truly overwhelmed, can’t enjoy time with your baby or feel like you can’t handle it all, don’t be afraid to reach out to your provider or pediatrician. Postpartum depression effects 1 in 9 women and you don’t have to suffer alone.

While getting through the first few weeks with your newborn can be challenging, it can still be a beautiful magical time with the right tools. You can survive the newborn stage. I hope that your experience is full of precious milky smiles, sweet baby snuggles and lots and lots of rest. Do you have a favorite memory from the first few weeks with your baby? Share below in the comments so we can all enjoy those warm fuzzies.